Fast Car – Tracy Chapman

This year was supposed to bring a lot of good things…I really thought so.. I really wished so, but so far it aint going so well. And the worst part is that according to my friends [at leas Dd] its all my fault…its all a consequence of my actions, a direct response of all the karma I put out there….

So many things that could have been so good, great, maybe even amazing…have been reduced to plain “lets hope this doesn’t get any shittier than this”.. so many hopes, so many fingers crossed for nothing…I feel as if the world is turning on the opposite direction, and everything is crumbling on my hands…some sort of alter ego of Midas.. everything I touch turns into salt…..

I don’t even know what I want anymore…everything Is so confusing and out of my control…I fell like a puppet or like someone riding a rollercoaster that cant get off. Im in so much pain…physically , mentally and soully [again, I don’t know if that’s a word but it doesn’t matter] that is not even funny. Im blindfolded and walking on a cable.. I just wanna crawl under a rock and stay there.. but I don’t have the strength to stand up and no one is going to save me…….. I want to be alone, to see if I can find some answers, but im afraid that when I do ( if I ever) find them, I wont have anyone to come back to ……

Im crying out for help...why doesn’t anybody listens????